The Ruble of Fault

2009.10.12
Blame ??? unless it's global warming

KGB's .plan

           name:  KGB
        project:  World Domination.

     login name:  kgb

         e-mail:  kgb@andrew.cmu.edu
   forwarded to:  exec@cmukgb.org

Mostly-Real Live Officers (reality status subject to change without notice):

President - Emily Forney (eforney)
Call Emily to deal with the whole KGB, that's right, all of it.
Call Emily for serious business.
Call Emily eforney, who is that Emily girl?
Call eforney for if you need another knee, she has 4.

1st Vice President - Adam "Bubbles" Leibowitz (aleibowi)
Call Bubbles if you've never been to a KGB meeting before.
Call Bubbles to fulfill all your improv needs.
Call Bubbles if there are unsuspecting freshmen around.
Call Bubbles when there is a lack of floating soapy spheres.

2nd Vice President - Timothy Vaughan (tvaughan)
Call Tim to inquire of our weekendly happenings.
Call Tim when you need music or evil seafood.
Call Tim if you have ideas to make weekendly happenings better.
Call Tim Zach, or Richard, or Carolyn.

Corresponding Secretary - Margaret Meyerhofer (mmeyerho)
Call Margaret when you want to correspond with the KGB.
Call Margaret if you like kittens.
Call Margaret to find out where and when exec meetings are.
Call Margaret if you don't like kittens and want to SUBMIT TO PRAVDA instead.

Recording Secretary - Timothy Broman (tbroman)
Call Tim Broman, two Tims are confusing.
Call Broman to read about our shenanigans.
Call Broman if you think the bylaws are silly.
Call Broman when your day is lacking Ultimate.

Treasurer - Kelly Harrington (kharring)
Call Kelly if you want to give KGB money.
Call Kelly to pay for that committee.
Call Kelly when you have pennies and a desire to throw them.
Call Kelly if you need to build a booth.

Sergeant-at-Arms - Clyde Shaffer (cshaffer)
Call Clyde if you follow Robert's Rules of Order.
Call Clyde to get a t-hoodie-shirt.
Call Clyde when the KGB Stuff is at stake.
Call Clyde Batman, he clearly is.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

C'mon.
Join.
You'll like it.
Everyone else is doing it.
What are you, scared?
Besides, it's good for you.
Buy more tangerines.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

For public audiences and group rates, please attend our meetings:
Mondays at 4:30 PM (1630)
Margaret Morrison 103
If locked, break glass.

For private showings and complaints, consider Executive Board meetings:
Tuesday at 4:30 PM (1630)
Student Government Conference Room (UC 306), environs.

PLEASE TO READ assocs.kgb.*
SACRILEGIOUSLY THANK YOU.

Check out our World Wide Web page:
http://www.cmukgb.org/
    or else.
Or else we'll update it.